1/04/2010

1/04/2010

i'm sorry all...again...but i'm in the process of trying to find work..it has gotten almost to desperation point....i don't have much money left so all of my time is focusing on looking for work...

my singing has gone completely to the side as i need to pay the bills....it sucks as i've improved so drastically and got a one in a million chance to study with a phenomenal flamenco singer in Madrid....it has been literally 3 months since i last sung a note...

it hurts...it really hurts....

i understand if many of you no longer read this blog since i have had not updated but i have to do what i have to do.......

wish me luck....i hope all of you are well......i hope to return..

AVIANA

Tavalodet Mobarak....

Tavalodet Mobarak....janam...my life....my heart....tavalodet mobarak....joon...siempre...siempre...

P.S. Katie Melua with "Just Like a Dream"

You're Here.....

Oh my God......

I did it...I wrote it....I actually wrote it...I finally did it.....

for almost 4 years this 4 measure chorus melody line has been in my fingers, inside me....tugging at my soul....begging me to give it an ending....to give it a beginning.....to give it life....making me sure i would never forget it even though i lost hope that i would never have the honor and the ability to give it life...to nurture it.....to help it grow.......to be...

but it had a soul...a soul calling out to me...begging me....and i think my soul...my inspiration finally answered....my soul finally returned the unrequited love to the melody..the unrequited love the song had for my lost of hope........the unrequited love the song had for me......

i wrote it...i wrote it....the song....i can't believe it....4 years!....it finally came out...i'm fighting back tears...odd that it came at the end of another bad day of looking and not finding work...odd it came on a day when another passion of mine did not get its just due....but this...you....my song....i wrote you.....just like i wrote "Before You Break My Heart..."....just like I wrote "Rise..."....i can't believe it......i finally wrote you....after all these years.....

wow....thank you for choosing me to serve as your vessel as you begged me all these years to give you life when all i had was a shadow of a skeleton.....all i had was doubt...

you are here....wow....i wrote you.....my song...............my song......

Susan Boyle

I'm sorry guys for not being active on my blog...I'm looking for a job and that is taking my time....My music and singing training and belly dance training have suffered drastically also...only thing is flamenco because I luckily get those classes for free and luckily from a phenomenal teacher...

However, I had to write a little note about... Susan Boyle... I'm upset, irrate, annoyed, bothered, saddened at people's reactions to Susan Boyle's magnificent singing voice. People are astonished, and some have gotten tears in their eyes because how amazed they are by her beautiful singing voice. People are celebrating her voice like she's the next coming of something holy.

Why is that? Is it because she doesn't look like, Shakira, Beyonce, Leona Lewis, Britney Spears, Halle Berry?...What does that say? If someone came on any stage and had some comparable beauty to the aforementioned or some other beauty queen, people wouldn't for the most part initially doubt on their singing abilities. They start on a blank slate. However, a 47 year woman who is not a size 2 with long flowing hair, who doesn't fit the typical model or barbie look is automatically looked upon as not as talented even before she has opened her mouth.

People started to laugh at Susan Boyle before she even opened her mouth! Sickening.

I don't have the most amazing singing voice. that's a fact. I don't look like the aforementioned celebrities. that's a fact. But i've come to realize that maybe we need to go back to the days where there wasn't music videos. When it was all based on the voice. Maybe then people wouldn't be as surprised that someone who doesn't look like Cindy Crawford can sing.

This is some of the reason why we have these sickening views on beauty, in particular of women. They have to feel like they have to look like something to be given a chance. I think Christina Aguilera stated some time ago that there were singers/backup singers a whole lot better and more talented than her. However, because they dont' look a certain way, they won't ever be given a chance.

Does Susan Boyle fit in that category?....Luckily her voice on national tv somehow gave her a chance and people's misconceptions on her talent and her looks...

If you are one of those people who laughed at her or simply somewhat doubted her...due to your views on beauty and now you are celebrating her talent....you should be ashamed of yourself...

P.S. here's the video since it can't be embedded...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY&feature=related

New Chapter...

Hello all

I hope you guys are all well! For those of you who are of Persian descent or Baha'i, Happy Naw Ruz!

For those who don't know, today is the first day of the Persian New Year and tomorrow is the first day of the Baha'i New Year. I believe that is correct, I'm not either but I believe that is correct. I have plenty of friends of mine who are celebrating this so there are lots of celebrations over the weekend starting tonite!

I'm sorry I have not been regular with my blog postings. I've been trying to create music, editing photos from Madrid, teaching myself alot on photoshop because I think photography is going to play a major role in the next chapter of my life. So I'm training myself as much as I can. I think I might go out into the photography world and start doing some professional gigs. I've been told my many that I have the talent and I should have been charging all along but I did not have confidence in my skills. But when my mom, who has not been supportive of my artistic endeavors to mention photography as a possible thing for me to do, I guess that must mean something right!...hehe...

Anyhow, I think I'm going to start with portraits and small events. But I will continue to do my artistic photography and my music. I've been worrying about money alot lately because I have not been working and I'm getting worried. I'm hoping this gig with the agency comes through or else I dont' know what's going to happen... :( Wish me luck guys...

One positive news is that I decided to launch an Art/Music Blog. A blog that will basically be me promoting different artists in whatever fields I like, in particular music and me discussing my passions. I noticed a few times whenever I put some artists on this blog right here...like on the youtube video on the right hand side of the screen....some of you have asked me here and there, who is the artist, how much you like the music, thanks for opening you up to something different....

Additionally, whenenever I play my Ipod or something at gatherings, people are always amazed at the amount and the varying kinds of music and people always want to know how I discovered the music, they tell me how much they love it and ask me what to recommend.

And also when I listen to certain artists I'm always like, "wow, why don't more people know about these artists?...even though they are not "pop-mainstream"...people should know more about them and maybe people can learn more about a different culture that way. Because I firmly believe music unites everyone. We don't all speak the same language but our souls understand the musical notes."

Well I just recently started to think about doing a blog on that! However, it will not just focus on music, but dancing of course since I dance, photography, theater and other forms of art that I feel inspired by. I don't know where that will go but we'll see...

I'm about to buy the domain name so I can't tell you what it's going to be called yet until it's for sure! :) I don't think I will put it on Blogspot. Nothing wrong but I think I want it to develop a little bit more into what, I don't know! We'll see...

Anyhow, I hope all is well with you guys. I can't stay. I gotta go get ready for a Naw-Ruz celebration. Gonna be with some friends tonite and then go to a photography open house tonite. check it out, see the set up and possibly renting out studio space and maybe take a class here and there if possible once I get a job. Hopefully, the agency pulls through this week or next week! Cross your fingers and say a little prayer for me!

By the way this video/song is something I just found a couple of weeks ago. Actually I bought a compilation CD of a number of Indian artists and this is one of my favorite songs. I can't get enough of it. I never saw the movie that came along with it. I think there was a movie. I'm assuming so because of this youtube video. Anyhow it brings me pure joy and my soul just can't stop soaring when I listen to this music piece. It's by A.R. Rahman & Chinmayee. I just found out A.R. Rahman won 2 Oscars for Slumdog Millionaire. I did not watch the movie...because my pockets are tight and I'm more of a Netflix girl anyhow. I knew that movie was a big movie. I will watch it on Netflix.

Of course I believe my Indian readers will appreciate my love for this piece. :)

Oh if any of my Indian readers can translate a little bit and tell me what this song is about, I would greatly appreciate it. :)

Alrite, have good one and I'll speak to you soon!

AVIANA

P.S. A.R. Rahman & Chinmayee with Tere Bina

P.S.S. I love the picture on the top!. I found it online...I wanted a blue picture for today especially because when I hear this song, I think of the color blue... Oh it's not mine. Unless noted, the pictures on the blog are not mine. Bye!

I'm Back...

Hello All,

I hope all is well. I am back from Madrid.

It was an interesting trip. I am so excited that my family has extended. I met some amazing individuals and my soul won't be at ease again until I see them again. Such wonderful souls....I'm deeply humbled... I only hope I am trully deserving of meeting them. Wow....I will do whatever I can to see you soon. My soul is aching to see you all...wow..such spiritual connections... I will see you again.... My hope and determination is this September!

My life back here. I'm going through some artistic motions mostly thanks to my soul connections in Madrid. Not sure what I will do next. I am more eager to grow and practice on a daily basis now. Will I teach again?.....I'm not sure....I'm more inclined to say "NO" at this point. Due to my belief that I need to train better on my own before I teach anymore. I'm waiting for my teacher Marta to return from her trip to train again. I need to appropriately study for the Suhaila Salimpour Level 2 certification. I am due to test in October but I may have to push that back for another year. Not happy with that...unless I do major overtime with training between now and the Fall.

Photography is taking a bigger and bigger role in my life. Not sure what. But I'll see where this road takes me.....

Anyhow, my creative juices have been renewed. I just need my pockets to be filled with some money to keep me going. :) I can't stay and write for too long. I must go back to some non-paying artistic work right now. hah!....

I'll upload a couple of pics soon of my trip so that you know that I did actually go to Madrid!

Anyhow must go....Oh this video is of one of my favorite singers out there...Concha Buika. She is from Spain. She is a beyond phenomenal singer!

I will write soon. Hope all is well... :)

AVIANA

P.S. Concha Buika with Mienteme Bien